“The Road Not Taken” by Robert FrostTwo roads diverged in a yellow wood,And sorry I could not travel bothAnd be one traveler, long I stoodAnd looked down one as far as I couldTo where it bent in the undergrowth;Then took the other, as just as fair,And having perhaps the better claim,Because it was grassy and wanted wear;Though as for that the passing thereHad worn them really about the same,And both that morning equally layIn leaves no step had trodden black.Oh, I kept the first for another day!Yet knowing how way leads on to way,I doubted if I should ever come back.I shall be telling this with a sighSomewhere ages and ages hence:Two roads diverged in a wood, and I–I took the one less traveled by,And that has made all the difference.
Not to mention that my top love language is physical affection. (For more on love languages, go here.) I mean, seriously! I feel loved by being touched and I haven’t had a beau to hold my hand, rub my shoulders, or give me tight, squeezy hugs. I have let God know how unfair that was…but then I realized I had amazing friends and family who consistently went out of their way to give me a hug or let me sit SUPER-CLOSE to them while in church or watching a movie.
- The past 6 or so years, I’ve gotten to travel to more places than in the previous 19 combined! I’ve visited at least 8 states, not including Indiana, plus visiting Israel in 2013. It’s been an adventure! I could have missed God speaking to my heart on the Sea of Galilee, saying, “Amanda, I see you, and I hear you.” What healing that brought to my life!
- I have realized a bigger purpose for my life. God has allowed me to work at a local preschool for the past 6 1/2 years and has stirred up a fiery passion and deep love for children. I am involved in children’s ministry at my church and I am finishing up a degree in Elementary Education. God has given me gifts of teaching, loving children, and helping, and I have had plenty of time to use those gifts to serve Him and to serve others.
- Mandy Hale, author of The Single Woman: Life, Love, and a Dash of Sass, defined singleness in a way I have found so true–“‘Single’ means you are brave enough to face the glorious unknown of the unaccompanied journey.” As a Christian, I know I’m never alone because I have a Best Friend named Jesus, but its also different than having a flesh-and-bone person walking right beside you. There have been times I’ve gotten to face my fears, relinquish my insecurities, and know Jesus in a deeper way through prayer, Bible reading and study, and through how He shows up in my everyday life. There are times when the only person who really “gets me” and sees the depth of my heart is Jesus.
- As a single woman, I’ve had many opportunities to expand my horizons and get to know many different people! Had I been tied to another person or schedule, I couldn’t have taken advantage of those opportunities in the same way! One such opportunity included going to West Virginia and helping with a Girl’s Only Purity event. Another phenomenal opportunity came this past July when I traveled to New York City with an organization called Spread Truth in order to share God’s Story. Just those two trips alone greatly impacted me and have led to a deepening love for people and a greater understanding of God.
- I have learned so much in the past 6 years. I’ve had time to focus on me and Jesus–that’s it. Some things you many not see on the outside, but inside I’ve learned so much how to love people and how to love myself. I’m developing into the woman God created me to be!
- I’ve gotten to nurture my relationships with my family! How great is that!!! The past several years my Mom has moved a couple of times, and my Dad and Step-mom now live about 45 minutes from Louisville, Kentucky on a beautiful plot of land. My twinny lives about an hour and a half south of me, too. So, because I’m not tightly tied to a person or schedule, I can go visit my family at the drop of the hat. If I’m feeling a need for vacation, I go for it!
- In the King James Version of the Bible, James 1:4 says, “But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.” That verse sucker punched me a couple years back; it was then I realized patience was a beneficial, positive force! I understood afresh that though patience can make one perfect and whole, lacking nothing, one has to LET it. The past 6 years have taught me a lot about patience and trusting God. It’s easy to say that God is big and powerful and that He loves me, but its another thing when I want something that He hasn’t given me yet. I have had an abundance of opportunities to exercise my patience and trust muscles! I’ve gotten to lean on the Word of God, going by faith in what I cannot see. I don’t know if I’ll be married, when I’ll be married, or to whom, but I know that God has plans for good and not for evil for my life. Plans to give me hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11). And that’s enough for me.
- Lastly, Nancy Leigh DeMoss, head of the Revive Our Hearts Women’s Ministry, often says, “Anything that makes me need God is a blessing.” Sometimes that is not an easy statement to agree with because we live in a fallen world with fallen people. But can I just tell you that I have “tasted and seen that the Lord is good” and that “His mercy endures forever?” There have been days and nights where I have offered my desire for marriage up to God as an offering (reference to the Old Testament Jewish Sacrificial System). Those offerings cost me something–mostly control–but when the human soul reaches a place of emptiness or grief or quietness in response to its Maker, there is a peace and joy that comes that can’t be felt anywhere or any way else.
Not many young adults stay single very long. I’m sure you’d agree. Believe me, if I hadn’t made a commitment to God, I wouldn’t have either. It has taken 6 years for me to be sincerely thankful for my singleness, and now I’m finally able to enjoy the adventure of every day.
I took the road less traveled by…and that has made all the difference.